No, this is not a gay porn DVD title–amazingly enough, that’s a true headline! Check out this article from Der Spiegel–they called it panzerschokolade!
It was in Germany, though, that the drug first became popular. When the then-Berlin-based drug maker Temmler Werke launched its methamphetamine compound onto the market in 1938, high-ranking army physiologist Otto Ranke saw in it a true miracle drug that could keep tired pilots alert and an entire army euphoric. It was the ideal war drug. In September 1939, Ranke tested the drug on university students, who were suddenly capable of impressive productivity despite being short on sleep.
From that point on, the Wehrmacht, Germany’s World War II army, distributed millions of the tablets to soldiers on the front, who soon dubbed the stimulant “Panzerschokolade” (“tank chocolate”). British newspapers reported that German soldiers were using a “miracle pill.” But for many soldiers, the miracle became a nightmare.
As enticing as the drug was, its long-term effects on the human body were just as devastating. Short rest periods weren’t enough to make up for long stretches of wakefulness, and the soldiers quickly became addicted to the stimulant. And with addiction came sweating, dizziness, depression and hallucinations. There were soldiers who died of heart failure and others who shot themselves during psychotic phases. Some doctors took a skeptical view of the drug in light of these side effects. Even Leonardo Conti, the Third Reich’s top health official, wanted to limit use of the drug, but was ultimately unsuccessful.
And the guys kept driving the panzers around all night long, making a mess of the macadam, and then they’d stay up another night to dissassemble the tanks and leave the parts strewn all over the yard. What a mess! Just imagine the crazy if the Continental Army had their hands on this stuff–although I suppose the smallpox vaccine would have given them an even better military advantage, considering. (That, and maybe some properly dug out and maintained latrines? Just sayin’.)
Don’t do meth, kids: it’s a Nazi drug. Meanwhile, imagine your favorite period in history plus crystal meth in the comments below. Or, just browse Fuck Yeah History Crushes! Funny.
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