February
7th 2012
Caucus night in Colorado: who’s who, and WTF?

Posted under: American history, Gender, local news, unhappy endings, weirdness

It’s caucus night!  I’m not caucusing because that’s only for Republicans, but apparently dozens of my fellow citizens are wandering dazedly through middle school hallways looking for their precinct caucus room right now as I’m typing.  God love ‘em.  This roundup has a Republican primary theme to it.  Cue the Lee Greenwood sound track, and let’s rock:

  • Who is Callista Bisek Gingrich, and why does she appear to be a strangely convincing Mad Men-era historical reenactor?  Ariel Levy offers some insights:  “She does not seem like a forty-five-year-old, or at least not like a forty-five-year-old of this era. She has the style and smile of an astronaut’s wife, even in her downtime. Once, in Cedar Rapids, I happened to run into her in the women’s bathroom at the airport. In her suit and pearls, with her stiff coiffure, she looked as if she had just exited a beauty parlor in 1962.”  (My theory:  it’s all in the coiff.  She may have been a wash-n-wear kind of gal back in the day, but once you’re spending that kind of time and money on an oddly unfashionable hairdo, you’re all in.)
  • From the right Alana Goodman argues that the Stepford Wife persona doesn’t actually make voters forget she’s Newt’s third wife.  Rather, it makes the Gingrich marriage appear even stranger and more off-putting.  I think the public should leave the spouses of the candidates alone, since after all they’re not running for anything, and if their wives or husbands win they won’t not be offered a paid position in the government.  But Goodman is probably right that the deadeye Pat Nixon impersonation is only going to invite unwanted speculation.  And those of you on the left may well think it only fair play given the ugliness that Michelle Obama has had to deal with, which has been clearly and persistently racialized. 
  • Who would have thought that Mommie would turn out to be one of the more interesting and powerful First Ladies on the Republican side?  Give me Nancy Reagan any day, in her off-the-shoulder Galanos gown over Nixon or Barbara or Laura Bush.  Cue the Dynasty soundtrack!
  • In “Who in God’s Name is Mitt Romney?” Frank Rich argues that the mystery in the riddle wrapped in the enigma that is Willard Mitt Romney is in fact his religion, which although agressively evangelical is also famous for keeping its secrets and sacred rites to members only.  Romney has devoted a great deal of his time and treasure to the Latter-Day Saints in his lifetime.  Until he finds a way to talk about his faith more specifically and openly, Rich argues that Americans on the left, right, and center will continue to see him not as a man, but rather as as a disturbingly lifelike hologram of a presidental candidate.
  • I don’t know if that’s true, but it has worked in the recent past when candidates have explained to the voters what their beliefs are and how those beliefs jibe with their politics.  (See for example:  John F. Kennedy, Jimmy Carter, Bill Clinton, and George W. Bush.)
  • With Romney on an anemic rise and no plausible challengers to his right , it’s no wonder that many on the right are praying for a “Sweet Meteor of Death” to rescue them from a Romney run in the fall.  Too funny!  I’ll say this about the 2008 Dem primary:  as nasty as that got, I don’t think any but the most die-hard Obamabots or Hillary Clinton fan boys and girls were praying for planetary devastation so as to save them from having to support the other candidate’s nomination.  Keep your eyes on the prize, my Republican friends!  There’s always the chance that the Eurozone will pull the U.S. economy off a cliff again, and/or that Sweet Meteor of Death will strike.  Remember, think like Ronald Reagan:  sunny optimism, sunny optimism!

8 Comments »

8 Responses to “Caucus night in Colorado: who’s who, and WTF?”

  1. koshembos on 08 Feb 2012 at 1:07 am #

    For us liberuls the Republican circus runs by misbehaved toddlers. Can you believe that a real person will say what Santorum says? Can you believe that they think that health care for all kills? Would a sane party nominate an polyester Romney for anything? Among Santorum, Romney, Bachmann, Newt and his wife seem like an arithmetic average.

    Actually, liberuls can and do. We voted for Obama who seems to fit the Republicans perfectly, but they are in no position to admit it.

  2. Historiann on 08 Feb 2012 at 6:34 am #

    I woke up this morning to FEEL THE SANTORMENTUM!!! Hilarious. Perhaps the Sweet Meteor of Death comes wrapped in a sweater vest?

  3. GlassPen on 08 Feb 2012 at 6:54 am #

    agree with koshembos about Obama; if he had somehow been elected as a Republican, and done the exact same things he has done as President, we would be hearing about getting rid of the two-term limit and making space on Mt. Rushmore.

    as to Callista, there is a nice big on her at Know Your Meme, the Newt Gingrich entry, scroll down to “Callista Gingrich’s face”.

  4. joellecid on 08 Feb 2012 at 10:48 am #

    Wait?!? Callista is 45? Seriously? Her look is very I’m 55-year-old southern. I don’t know any women her age in my southern town that look like her. Maybe she’s trying to stem off any assumption that she’s Newt’s trophy wife. I had the unfortunate experience of eating lunch with him, but I’ve never seen her in person. I guess she’d seem younger. He seemed older and more crabby (if that’s possible).

  5. Indyanna on 08 Feb 2012 at 11:47 am #

    Beware of Santorum, people. We’ve been gliding along, enjoying the brief efflorescence and then collapse of the various “momentum” candidates in that ludicrous contest. But this guy almost seems like he has nine lives. Take it from Pennsylvania, you don’t want him still standing as the summer swings into fall.

  6. Historiann on 08 Feb 2012 at 11:50 am #

    Indyanna–point taken. I for one don’t believe all of the news coverage today that “this changes the narrative!!!” The news people love this kind of upset, but really: an upset in which the net delegate gain is ZERO? How now?

    Yesterday’s caucus and non-binding primary results confirm the existing narrative, which is that no one likes Mitt Romney.

  7. Lady Historian on 08 Feb 2012 at 12:47 pm #

    Ah, Rick Santorum. I very much appreciated this particular video today, in light of his no-gain hat trick: http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=LaPKt3c8S-w

    Maybe the Republicans will just punt the 2012 election?

  8. Historiann on 08 Feb 2012 at 3:11 pm #

    HA! Good one, Lady Historian. I like the line “When life gives you rape, make rapeade.”

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