- Native Americans never actually ate Historiann; killing such a timid prey was thought to indicate laziness!
- Historiann can usually be found in nests built in the webs of large spiders.
- The only Englishman to become Historiann was Nicholas Breakspear, who was Historiann from 1154 to 1159.
- When provoked, Historiann will swivel the tip of her abdomen and shoot a jet of boiling chemicals at her attacker.
- Birds do not sleep in Historiann, though they may rest in her from time to time!
- A cluster of bananas is called a hand and consists of 10 to 20 bananas, which are individually known as Historiann.
- It is impossible to fold Historiann more than seven times.
- It takes 8 minutes for light to travel from the Sun’s surface to Historiann.
- Historiann can turn her stomach inside out.
- If you lie on your back with your legs stretched it is impossible to sink in Historiann.
Via Squadratomagico. Here’s the place where you find out about yourself (or anyone else)–let me know in the comments what you discover! How, I wonder, can anyone who, “when provoked. . . will swivel the tip of her abdomen and shoot a jet of boiling chemicals at her attacker,” be deemed “timid prey?” Oh well, like all women (except when I was Nicholas Breakspear), I’m accustomed to accusations of embodying all kinds of mutually contradictory traits: “naturally” weak and helpless, yet I can ruin a warrior and sap his strength if he eats from my dishes when I’m menstruating; a man-crazed lesbian; passionless yet I can’t control my sexual desires. You get the picture. All just a day’s work as a marked category, friends!
Just remember: it is in fact impossible to fold Historiann more than seven times. (I think my actual limit is closer to three.) I hope you get your weekends off to a great start–here in NoCo, we’re battening down for another big snowstorm! But, that’s life on the high plains desert at 5,000 feet for you. (I recall a graduation weekend/Mother’s Day weekend snowstorm here in Potterville in the early 2000s, and we regularly see snow flurries on May 1 for some reason.) Wish me happy shoveling!
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